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Daughters of Tomorrow

Daughters of Tomorrow

Warning: Please be aware that this post discusses a crime that was committed a while ago in India and which became a high profile case in the country’s  judiciary system. The description of the incident in this post might be disturbing to some readers! 

 

My Dad was quite over protective when I was a teenager. He gave me lessons every day on how to carry myself in public, how to (rather not to) talk to strangers and not to get involved with anyone unnecessarily. Even though, My Dad and I were friends (sort of), there were lines that he dictated and I was forced at times to follow. I was lectured constantly to get straight home soon after school, have minimal contacts with my friends and hanging out with them and was strictly forbidden to entertain friends at home. As you can imagine, I was terribly not on board with this and constantly got into fights with him about things that I couldn’t agree. He used to get mad when I don’t listen and when things get totally out of control with a willful youngster like me, my Dad will abruptly change his tracks. He will start reasoning ever so calm.

Daughters of Tomorrow

 He would explain: “Listen, the world is bad and it is increasingly so these days. I know that you do have good friends and I am not against them. What I am worried about is the fact that you cannot judge other person’s mind and what he or she is up to on situations. You trust them, I know that. But the question is, Are they trustworthy enough for you to loosen your guard? Terrible things happen around here, honey and you should be wise enough to stay out of harm’s way. All I want is your safety”.

 My reply (which is totally clichéd):”Dad, I know how to take care of myself. I am big enough to know what sort of people that I am dealing with and won’t get into trouble on every turn, for God’s sake!”

Our verbal exchange back then amounted to more or less like mentioned above.

I almost feel lame listening to myself through the words spoken by a ‘younger me’. Years have passed and I became a Wife and a Mom. I have a baby girl who is three years old and I already worry about her life. I wonder about the friendships that she would choose and the roads that she would take. I do not know whether she would listen to her Mom’s opinions and takes on her life’s situations.

 But let’s just keep this for another day…

 There was a horrible incident that took place in Delhi, the capital of India which attracted world wide attention. It was about a gang rape and killing of a young girl. She was doing an internship at a hospital after completing her graduation of four years in Physiotherapy. She was out for a movie with her male companion and took a bus back home with him at about 9.30 night on December 16,2012. The bus was apparently engaged in a ‘joy ride’ occupied by the Driver (who is obviously driving), his brother and four other passengers who was later confessed as friends. The girl and her friend were told that it is a scheduled bus and going to the appropriate destination, so they boarded it unaware of the danger they will be facing soon. What happened next was described as one of the most brutal and horrific act of crime in the history of all crimes. The male friend was beaten relentlessly with an iron rod by the perpetrators and he ended up unconscious. He was shoved aside and the five men turned to the girl for their fill. They raped her repeatedly all the while beating her to pulp. The same iron rod was used on the girl as well, at various body parts which is highly incriminating and gruesomely impossible to mention here.

Blood was pouring out everywhere…

After all was done, they both were thrown out of the moving bus to a road side in the dark. Shortly afterwards, a passer by found the victims and they were taken to the hospital.

                   The girl’s name was not released until much later. Her name was Jyoti Singh as told by her Dad. She was beautiful and intelligent. She aspired to be a Doctor and had dreams to be someone in life. She wanted to travel abroad and make lots of money. Jyoti came from a poor family and she was always aware of the hardships that her Dad had to go through to educate her. She promised him a comfortable life after she has done her studies and start working… Her Dad told the newspapers that when he visited his daughter at the hospital, she tried to speak to him but couldn’t because of all the tubes and medical equipments on her. So she wrote in a piece of paper for him to read: “I want to get better, I want to live…” But it was not to be. She passed away thirteen days after the attack at a hospital in Singapore. A beautiful life came to an end.

                                            There were uprisings and demonstrations following this and the Indian police had a very hard time suppressing the public outrage at Jyoti’s murder.

Jyoti’s Dad talked about his daughter and how her life would have taken a different turn if she didn’t board that monstrous bus. But there are things that we cannot control and one of them is Fate. He said that Jyoti was a gentle soul and mindful of others.  She was a vibrant youth and carried her energy everywhere she went and always left a part of her joyful self in the people that she met along in her life.

                                I saw Jyoti’s Dad’s pictures in the news and what I noticed first about him was his eyes. They were deep with grief and sorrow in the untimely demise of his little girl. His demeanor spoke volumes about his grim predicament on continuing the rest of his life without his baby girl and living through the emptiness of it which is unfathomable by anyone.

My Dad and I!

My Dad and I!

For some reason, my mind wandered off to the times when my Dad used to stalk me with his impositions on how to stay safe and unhurt by the world. I remembered the countless rules that he imprinted on my head all for the sake of keeping me safe and teaching me the ways of the world. I also thought about what he said years ago:  

          “Terrible things happen around here, honey and you should be wise enough to stay out of harm’s way. All I want is your safety”.

             I now realize how wise he had been by being over protective so that I safely trod my way along and reached where I am today. ..I thank God sincerely that he did not need to share the fate of Jyoti’s Dad on my account. But my heart breaks remembering all those parents including Jyoti’s who couldn’t fight the evils of the world for their daughters…I remember the ones who fought hard but still lost… With all my heart, I pray that the world be a safer place for our children to grow up tomorrow. A prayer that will only be answered with time…

 

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31 Comments

  • Reply
    Jennifer
    6 March, 2013 at 9:47 am

    This is the most horrible thing that I have ever read about! I have not heard about this here yet. My heart breaks for this family and for the beautiful young lady who lost her life. This type of thing is exactly why I am so over protective with my kids also. I know how evil the world can be and they are so innocent. They think that everyone is good.

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      6 March, 2013 at 9:50 am

      Exactly Jennifer, the feelings are mutual. It still strikes me hard after all this time when i read about it. Truly horrible!

  • Reply
    Penny Roach
    6 March, 2013 at 11:01 am

    This is so vile and heartbreaking. Even at my age, having witnessed and endured some pretty disgusting behavior, I find this shocking. I can’t even fathom what gets into someone’s head that they would carry out something to evil.

    I did not hear about this when it happened. I certainly hope there is justice served in India, but none of it will bring back that beautiful soul. So tragic!!

    Penny at Green Moms and Kids
    Penny Roach recently posted…Hollywood Goes GreenMy Profile

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      6 March, 2013 at 12:30 pm

      The trial is still going on, it says that it will at least take a few more months to convict all the five killers. I do hope the justice be appropriately served.

  • Reply
    Lana
    6 March, 2013 at 11:32 am

    I read about this when it happened, and one of my best Indian friends was so distraught over it. Did you see the photo of the Indian men wearing skirts with things written on them like, ” Don’t blame the skirt, blame the man!”? It was incredible!
    Lana recently posted…How to Make SilhouettesMy Profile

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      6 March, 2013 at 12:27 pm

      Thank you for reading and taking time to comment Lana. There were huge uprisings in India after this heart-breaking incident happened. I had to write about this after the girl’s name was released to the media by her Dad. It was sad to listen to him talking about her daughter…

  • Reply
    Queen Mommy
    6 March, 2013 at 11:47 am

    The worst part is it happens EVERYWHERE! even here in the US. It’s terrifying. I keep thinking, times are harder for me than they were for my parents, what is this world going to be like for MY children. I have two daughters. I want them to be treated right, with compassion and love. I want to teach my son HOW he should treat women. That he should stand up for them WHEN they are being mistreated not laugh along with the others. The things that happened in this post should NOT be happening ANYWHERE. it makes me mad.
    Queen Mommy recently posted…Spring Creation: Peek-A-Boo Bunny and Putting it all together!My Profile

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      6 March, 2013 at 12:29 pm

      Absolutely right! It happens every where. I still remember the five year old little girl, Tori Stafford murdered by a guy and his girl friend few years ago in Canada. It still gives me chill thinking about that poor little girl’s torturous death and her family’s plight! .. All I can do is pray for our children’s safety.

  • Reply
    Bethanne Murray
    6 March, 2013 at 2:09 pm

    Such a terrible tragedy! I hadn’t heard about this story until now. Unfortunately, It is a story told far too often. The statistics surrounding rape and sexual assault are horrific.

    Over 400,000 women are sexually assaulted each year

    1 in 5 women (aged 16 – 59) has experienced some form of sexual violence since the age of 16.

    Your father was right, my parents too. Unfortunately, I didn’t listen, but I now can teach my daughter through my mistakes.
    Bethanne Murray recently posted…My First Wordless Wednesday!My Profile

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      7 March, 2013 at 8:06 am

      you are right! numbers on the rape and sexual assaults are mind blowing! I can only hope that the world turn out to be a better place for our children when they grow up so that they can live their life in peace and safety. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  • Reply
    Bethanne Murray
    6 March, 2013 at 9:19 pm

    I have awarded you a Liebster Award! Stop by my page to pick it up!

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      7 March, 2013 at 8:04 am

      Thanks for the nomination Bethanne. Will stop by 🙂

  • Reply
    Shainee
    7 March, 2013 at 12:45 am

    Yes, I’ve heard about this painful incident. I wrote a post on it too. My family and me doesn’t feel safe anymore after 7pm. My parents worry about me a lot now a days when i’m not home. They call me to ask where I am, which they never did before. They now want to follow me wherever i go. I feel scared too but I dont show it to my parents. Unfortunately, for some sick male people we women are suffering for no reasons. Its time to change the mindset of all men around the world. Hope things will change someday and our daughters would inhale air of freedom and dignity when they grow up. Thanks for writing about it !
    Shainee recently posted…P.S. I Miss You.My Profile

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      7 March, 2013 at 8:03 am

      I have read your post before on this topic where you mentioned the man who showed up at your house when your mom and dad were not around. It sounded very dangerous when I read your story back then. But thank god you were okay.. I really appreciate your thoughts on this and how it affected you and people who are close to you. This was exactly what I was looking for when I wrote this. Thanks for sharing 🙂

  • Reply
    Sanoj
    7 March, 2013 at 1:03 am

    Good food for thought! I take this as an advice that need to be duly taken care as a responsible father, while bringing up my kids. Thanks. Anyways well written once again, as usual really interesting. I am truly your adherent fan.
    Regarding the narrated Delhi incident; Yes it was one of the most barbarian acts done by a group of men who were severely intoxicated, but that is not an excuse to do such barbarian deeds that literally tear apart an innocent soul. I consider this as totally inhuman and such incidents make me feel ashamed to be a man!

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      7 March, 2013 at 8:01 am

      Thank you for reading 🙂 I appreciate your reflections on this. It is really sad that tragedies like this is quite common everywhere. There needs to be awareness on the respectability of women and keeping her safe. I can only hope that things get better some day…

  • Reply
    Vicky Willenberg
    7 March, 2013 at 10:22 pm

    When we are young it’s hard to imagine the things our parents warn us about. When we are grown it’s hard to imagine letting our own kids out into the world. Prayer and education seem to often be the only tools we have as parents. I remember when this tragedy ocurred and I too felt outraged and grief-striken that these things still happen. But educated the world and people crying out for change and justice go a long way in helping even the oldest of systems slowly make changes.
    Thanks for addressing an important topic.
    Vicky
    Vicky Willenberg recently posted…All The Cool Moms Are Doing It: An After School Special for MomsMy Profile

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      8 March, 2013 at 8:13 am

      you are right Vicky. Prayer and education seems to be the only weapons we have to fight the tragedies like this. I hope awareness on this kind of situations goes a long way in helping our children to understand the real world out there. Thanks for your comment on this. 🙂

  • Reply
    Michelle
    8 March, 2013 at 7:51 am

    This story is heartbreaking! I can’t even begin to fathom how anyone could do such a thing! My heart goes out to her family. My kids are in those teen and tween years and are becoming more independent. I try very hard to warn them of the dangers that are out there so they are constantly aware of their surroundings. It’s funny though, my daughter says the same sort of thing to me as you did to your Dad. And I probably said the same thing to my parents. I think its probably universal among kids! 🙂
    Michelle recently posted…Classic Mom “What Was I Thinking?” MomentMy Profile

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      8 March, 2013 at 8:10 am

      Thank you for stopping by 🙂 yes, this is a terrible tragedy and it still creates ripples of disturbances and havoc in the Indian society. I always used to talk back to my Dad when he tries to straighten me out and I didn’t know at that time that I was using a line which is been used zillions of times by teenagers around the world 🙂 Its funny that I think about it now..

  • Reply
    Tamara
    8 March, 2013 at 10:43 am

    What a previous poster wrote about being young and not imagining the horrors of the world, or at least not thinking they could ever happen to us, and then growing up and having children. It’s mind-blowing. This news story sickened my husband and me. Our little girl is three now, and three or thirty, she will forever by our little girl. Just so sickening.
    Tamara recently posted…No Words: Lifestyle Photography.My Profile

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      8 March, 2013 at 11:05 am

      Absolutely! three or thirty, they will forever remain as our little ones.. I worry about my children constantly and it is one thing I doubt that I will get reprieve from ever 🙂 Praying and hoping is the only thing that is left to do..
      Momless Mom recently posted…Daughters of TomorrowMy Profile

  • Reply
    Frugal Foodie in WV
    9 March, 2013 at 6:48 pm

    I remember hearing about the incident on the news. The whole thing was really sad. I was lucky that my parents allowed me a lot of freedom growing up and I lived in an area which was very safe. Since I have two boys I am always telling my two boys to treat women with respect. Your posts are always thought provoking.
    Frugal Foodie in WV recently posted…Grilled Cheese with Bourbon Melted Onions and Homemade BreadMy Profile

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      9 March, 2013 at 8:28 pm

      Thanks for your comment Anne! I am glad that you already tell your boys about treating women with respect. As they say, ‘education begins from home…’

  • Reply
    Rina
    9 March, 2013 at 9:43 pm

    I have been following the news about this tragedy and there is no words I can say to describe how terrible I feel for dear Joyti.
    I stayed in India for two years, mostly in New Delhi and I have traveled and stayed in various regions like Udaipur, Agra, Bangalore and Gurgaon, and despite how much I loved India and cherished every moment I was there I know how rapes are high there.
    I hope Joyti’s family would finally find peace and the perpetrators get the maximum sentence.
    Rina recently posted…A True DelightMy Profile

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      11 March, 2013 at 11:28 am

      Rina! Thanks for stopping by. I also wish for the maximum sentence for the people who have committed this crime. It was brutal and shouldn’t go unpunished.
      Momless Mom recently posted…Daughters of TomorrowMy Profile

  • Reply
    Jennifer Thompson
    11 March, 2013 at 12:58 pm

    First, thank you for finding me, and for the follow. I am happily doing the same to your blog now! Second, what a horrific tragedy. It is so ironic that the world can be filled with such light and such darkness at the same time. My heart aches for poor Jyoti and her family, as well as her male companion and what he must have suffered. I TRULY believe that there will come a time when all will be held accountable for how they lived their life, and justice will be served. That is what gives me hope.
    Jennifer Thompson recently posted…Double the Honor–Liebster Blog AwardMy Profile

    • Reply
      Momless Mom
      11 March, 2013 at 4:47 pm

      Thanks for your valuable comment and the follow Jennifer! Truly appreciate your words on Jyoti’s horrible tragedy.
      Momless Mom recently posted…Daughters of TomorrowMy Profile

  • Reply
    Judy Haughton-James
    12 March, 2013 at 2:26 pm

    Your post gives serious food for thought. I also heard about this incident in India and it was really shocking. Sadly such incidents occur all over the world. One has to be very careful. I am a new Follower of your Blog. Enjoy the rest of your weekend.
    Judy – Judy H-J’s Thoughts
    Judy Haughton-James recently posted…Cocos In My Soup – Creative Monday Blog HopMy Profile

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